Back To Where It All Started

"it's better to regret something you've done, rather than something you haven't..."

So my spiritual journey had now come full circle and I was back 'home' in sunny Bognor Regis.
I had left here in the summer of 1997 and yet here I was again in August 2009, some 12 years later with a sense of failure, as if I had returned with my head bowed and my tail between my legs.
But when I thought about it deeply, I had actually experienced so much in those dozen years, and in New Zealand I had even lived my dream. I had lived in loads of different towns, villages and cities, and in reality I had nothing to feel ashamed about. Besides, I felt that this was only going to be a temporary home, and once I had put myself back on an even keel, I would be ready to continue my journey elsewhere in my persuit to find a place that I could really call 'home'. And even if I'd fallen flat on my face, or arse, depending on your viewpoint, at least I had tried which is where the opening phrase above proves somewhat prophetic.

Initially it was hard being back in Bognor Regis, but I must admit that the uneasy feeling didn't last long.
For the first time in my life I was officially unemployed, and had to suffer the indignity of 'signing-on' every fortnight and picking up my jobseekers allowance. I gave the majority of this to my parents and sister, as until I found work I was living with them, and most of my mornings were spent either on the internet surfing for available jobs, or writing letters concerning possible vacancies, and then during the afternoons I went for long walks along the beach or seafront, and breathed in the fresh sea air which I had missed so much.
Occassionally I bumped into some old friends from school, or some ex-work colleagues, or some old football team-mates, and I also made the effort to finally catch up with my great friends Gary & Lyn Shaw and their wonderful, now grown-up kids.
I was genuinely suprised that I was beginning to feel quite comfortable in these surroundings, but then again why shouldn't I as I'd spent the first 29 years of my life here after all.

After a couple of months being unemployed, I finally got lucky with a temporary job offer.
It was my birthday, I had just treated myself to a day out in Brighton, and whilst travelling back I received a phone call from a recruitment agency confirming that I had been successful in obtaining a position at Mercers in Chichester, as a pensions administrator - a position I still hold over a year later, but now in a permanent capacity. Happy Birthday Steve!

The fact that this job was in Chichester was a bonus as it was only twenty minutes away by bus or by train, and I even walked it on a few occassions during the better weather, but most of all I felt that finally things were taking a positive turn in my life once again.
Being back in work helped boost my self esteem, and I started enjoying a bit of a social life again mainly thanks to a new workmate called Curph.
The team I worked with were all great and very friendly, and Curph, Tom, Rich and I made an unofficial Friday drinking club! My bosses and supervisors were all very supportive, especially Nicky who like me had known and experienced the delights of Slough in her past.
Once my job had been made permanent I started making plans to move out of the home of my family, and find a place of my own once again. Unfortunately, this proved difficult due to the ongoing issue with the bank.
But I found a private landlord who specialised in house shares, and I soon aquired a new place in Annandale Avenue - how ironic was that - my old flat in Bognor all those years ago with Psycho was in the same street!
It wasn't a typical house share, as everyone was living in self contained bedsits within a large building. The only really communal room was the kitchen, but this place served its' purpose for seven months before an opportunity came my way to move to Chichester...but more of that a little bit later.

Living back in the heart of the town of Bognor after all of these years was quite interesting, and I definitely saw some changes since 12 years ago.
The ever increasing Polish and Eastern European population was probably the biggest difference that I encountered. Don't get me wrong, I have nothing against any of them and generally they are very honest, hard working people, and I later shared a house with some Poles who were always very pleasant and friendly. The only issue I really have with the Poles and the Eastern europeans is that once again they seem to be colonised by the local council or housing associations, a bit like the Asians in Slough. Sometimes this could be a bit intimidating if you ventured into the wrong place at the wrong time.
A funny incident happened one day as I was entering the building of my workplace in Chichester.
Rich reminded me that we had scaffolders in and referring to their equipment, told me to mind out for the poles. I quickly responded,
 " Don't worry about me fella - I'm from Bognor - I'm used to Poles!".
The scaffolders must have been local lads, as I heard a few of them chuckle at my comment.

When I think of my great friend Elona, an Albanian by birth, I just wish everyone could be like her.
I've known Elona for over ten years now and I love her to pieces. I first met her when we worked together in Reading, and despite my moving around she has always kept in touch with me wherever I am. We still meet up for lunch sometimes, and I owe her a great gratitude as it was she who encouraged me to start writing this blog, and it was she who enabled me to obtain a new passport due to her professional capacity, meaning that I can revisit my friends in Ireland and New Zealand next year. Incidentedly, by way of an explaination my ex-friend had destroyed all my old possessions including all my identification papers, and it took me forever to sort replacements out.
What I especially love about Elona is that she has embraced this country, she has studied and worked over here, even married an Englishman, and now she's a globetrotter with a high powered job who has recently visited Dubai, USA and Brazil with work, and still found time to visit family in Albania and Sweden, and holiday in Goa. I know that she can grace any country or continent with her sweet charm and gorgeous smile, and she is a great example of a person who deserves everything she gets out of life, because she's worked hard and she's earnt it, whilst never forgetting where she came from.
I feel so proud of all of her achievements and I'm proud that I can call her my good friend.
As I stated earlier, after seven months an opportunity arose for me to move to a flat share in Chichester, which made great economical sense if nothing else, as there would be no more travel expenditure and the rent was cheaper too! A friend from work, Josie had just left the company, and was looking for a new flat mate to share her home with her and her boyfriend. Once I found out she was looking I jumped at the chance and on 31st October 2010 I moved home yet again.
My good friend Giverny helped me move my stuff, and as she can no doubt testify I remain Mr.Minimalistic, as my entire worldly possessions fitted into the back of her car in one visit!
I recently read an article about one of my favourite actors, Denzel Washington, and in it he said that as you get older and wiser, you simplify. Well, I'm not sure about the wiser bit, but I definitely concur with the simplification part.
And what a small world it is - Josie's surname is O'Brennan which is Irish as sure as night follows day, but the strangest connection comes with her boyfriend Glen Staunton, who has family in Limerick - the same city as my other great Irish mate Glenn Courtney's family come from. I'm due to visit Ireland very soon, and hope to chat to Glenn's mother to see if she knows the Stauntons - like I said, it's a small world!

So this more-or-less brings me up to the present, with one final blog for 2010 to come next week
I'm happy to be living and working in Chichester, but no doubt I'll be getting itchy feet again soon.
I still feel that I'm on a spiritual journey to find my true 'home', and I remain optimistic with genuine hope that 2011 may provide me with the inspiration required to find this much treasured destination.

Until then, may I wish you all a very Merry Christmas...and as the genial comic Dave Allen always used to say, "May your God go with you!".

PS - Get well soon, Nicky!

Take care.

Nomadic Steve